If you know me personally, you know that I like to have all my ducks in a row. I always have a ridiculously detailed plan that I often become so attached to that you almost can’t pry it out of my hands. The other thing is when I commit myself to something so intensely, and I pour my heart into making it happen, I take it really personally when it doesn’t happen as I’ve planned or as I expect. What’s funny, though, is when I’ve figured out a way to deal with my bruised ego and I’m removed from the situation, I can often see how it was better that whatever my grand plan was didn’t work out. This morning, I was thinking about one of my plans – it hasn’t worked out yet (I’ll get to know soon) – and how I could have tweaked it to make it better (always a good thing, IMO). And this is one of those situations where there is no plan B, and I want to say that was part of the plan, so I’m beginning to get just a little anxious. And I realized that one way or the other, I’ll be fine. Yes, I’d like it all to work out a certain way, but if it doesn’t work out that way, I’ll figure out a plan to make it work out another way and by the time the leaves fall, I’ll look back and smile.
Either way, I’ll be fine. But I’m just thinking: it’s crazy how entrenched fear is and how intricately linked it is to uncertainty. This is why the insurance industry gets so much out of me. Meditation material…
PS. By the way, check out my thoughts on fear here.
Tomi’s Thoughts 